Ten.One Hundred & Seventy-Five

1. 4:28 AM. I think this just might be the result of anxiety.

2. I go to his car and grab my early Christmas presents: a studio light kit and reflectors. Because this Black Food & Bev project has me doing something I haven’t done much of before, which is exciting but also scary. And maybe this is just another edge to step to and over. 

3. He’s coughing a lot which means he needs a full day of rest and breathing treatments.

4. One of the flash heads is broken. He will need to return it. And actually I am okay with this. I remind myself that I've only ever shot in natural light, with no kinds of tools at all. I think of his advice: work with your limitations.

5. "Raimundo Panikkar...said the future will not be a new, big tower of power. Our hope in the future is the hope into well-trodden paths from house to house, these well-trodden paths from house to house. That is the image that holds a lot of promise for our future." - David Steindl-Rast

6. The restaurant is small and intimate. It feels like a neighborhood bar, like the kind of place you want to come to  shake off the world and feel like yourself again.

7. Eldridge is smooth and thoughtful and kind. He's got good energy. And as I move him from bar to window to wall to table he moves with ease. His beard and the way he smiles reminds me of my brother. When Andrea begins to interview him, and he gets into his own story and the story he's creating with The Delta, I can feel my insides begin to glow. Because this is what I love. I love listening to people talk about themselves and their passion and when it's so beautifully honest, it's like magic. Everything is alive.

8. "Ultimately, everything boils down to relation." - David Steindl-Rast

9. This chili recipe is not up to par. My cornbread, however, is on point.

10. I think of the old black and white images in The Delta's bathroom and on the walls and think of history and lineage, food and memory. What is my own?