Ten.One Hundred & Four

1. His nose is on my nose. He’s really getting to big for this. I’m uncomfortable and yet I can’t say no. 

2. I make the muffins first. Blueberry again. Then the lunches and the snacks while I listen to the song on repeat.  

3. I stand outside in my bare feet as the wind blows my sweater open. I have “thank you” cards to write. My bed for the gathering is secured. I’m going. I’m going.  

4. I love that in my receiving, I also get to give.  

5. She and I talk for almost 90 minutes even though we will see each other in two sleeps. Because that’s what best friends do. And I cannot wait to tell her everything over wine.  

6. Laundry. These ordinary things that make a life.  

7. Poldark.  

8. I leave early to get capers and to get a few extra minutes in the pick-up lane to journal. On my way to the store I listen to “Covered in Rain.” In the store my stomach is doing that thing where it’s turning, like I’m about to do something scary. Feeling can be scary. 

9. What would I say if I could? 

10. There are these rules once you make the agreement.