Ten.Three Hundred & Thirty-Two

1. 5 am and he's on the Xbox and there's that feeling you get as a parent when you catch your kid making a bad choice. It's less like anger and more like sadness and a little bit of guilt. 

2. I load the dishwasher, start the bacon, water the garden, and make coffee before any of the kids come downstairs. 

3. I almost feel like I have too much time which feels both luxurious and uncomfortable. 

4. Coffee in the alcove while I write my pages and it's hot. So hot. 

5. Cottonwood fluff sticking to freshly chapsticked lips. 

6. We settle on an elderflower cocktail called Eye Candy. Gin plus lemon juice plus a slice of ginger plus St. Germain plus leaves of mint with a splash of club soda.

7. Slow and easy late lunch with close friends. 

8. She sends me home with leftover angel food cake and freshly cut peonies from her yard because she knows they're my favorite. I need to plant these in the new house. 

9. Square of pale gold light on the wall. 

10. My mind is so full of questions, ideas, desires, plans that it hurts.