Ten.Two Hundred & Ninety-One

1. Why are they all down here?

2. There is not enough time for what needs to be done today. 

3. The addition of peanut butter cups and English butter fudge should give everyone a pretty good indication of how I might be feeling. I know it's bad but it's also so good. 

4. I call it self-absorption but maybe I've misdiagnosed. Maybe it really is just a personality difference that is not necessarily wrong but a way of being and seeing that feels too foreign for me to understand. 

5. My experience with the doctor and her question is generating a lot of feedback which means that we women still struggle with worth and value. 

6. I know that we say we value ourselves, but I wonder how large the gap is between believing it and then acting in life as if the belief is really true. 

7. Head down and fingers moving madly to get this done in time. My desire to stay on schedule this week is as much about work as it is rest. I want to honor the days of rest I need before taking flight. 

8. He tells me that someone got partially sucked out of an airplane window. 

9. At Culver's we see teachers and familiar faces, they have friends, and once again I feel out of place and not a part of anything here. 

10. I crack open the window but let in no breeze, only the low hum of passing cars on 34.