Ten.Three Hundred & Four
1. 2 a.m.
2. The three men in blues get on the air tran with the other woman and myself and then get off at the next stop. I didn't get a chance to extend eye contact and a "thank you."
3. Humans in airports are an interesting phenomenon.
4. The sun is beginning to rise and sky is stacked with deep purples and oranges, lush and moody, a fever dream in itself.
5. I want to go to sleep but every time I close my eyes a face appears and they begin to talk to me and it's so disruptive so I keep my eyes open.
6. Mildred Pierce.
7. I close my eyes in between questions and answers.
8. I'm grateful for the warmth. It's easing the return.
9. There will be words and probably tears at some time in the future. So much to feel, too much to feel all at once.
10. I go ahead and clean the kitchen even though I said I wouldn't. The ranunculus dried out while I was away. They remind me of our time together this weekend. Of how I wanted to cover everything with papery petals. Of how what I really mean is to be my natural self.