Ten.Two Hundred & Sixty-Six
1. She is up before 6am. I tell her she needs to wait another 15 minutes before coming down to make their breakfasts.
2. What kind of education are they really getting? What role do I want to play in it? Meaning, what more am I willing to do and with what time? How far can I push them? That distance may depend on how far they're willing to go? And at what point do trust them to know their limits?
3. I will always do my grocery shopping at 9am if it means I get to exchange smiles with him at the poultry case. The same tan coat and bright blue sneakers. Always joy in his voice. I bet he has good stories. It feels rare to see kindness like that in the eyes.
4. Insight upon insight.
5. I think back to something Seth Godin said at the On Being Gathering. Why am I spending so much time trying to build up areas in which I know I am weak instead of investing in my strengths?
6. It's warm enough today that I can turn off the car in the pick-up line and write in my journal. The sunlight reflecting off the paper is almost too bright. I manage to scribble out two pages anyway.
7. I should pay those library fines so that I can read some more poetry. I'm craving it more than ever right now.
8. I can see the handful of DMs. I'm sure they are questions as to where I am or have been, if everything is OK.
9. Maybe I ask myself too many questions. I could sit and think for hours, days, years. I could dream up all kinds of possibilities and make marks on maps for places I'll never go. What is it that weighs down my feet? This is not being grounded. This is feeling stuck.
10. From this spot I can watch the sky change. Just beyond the neighbor's yard is a small piece of water and it too changes with the sky. There are tiny ripples of glittering light. Maybe one day we'll live by the ocean.