Ten.One Hundred & Twenty-Five

1. Just 15 more minutes.  

2. More clouds. I might be angry because it’s been too many days since I’ve seen the sun. 

3. I do the dishes and dry the containers for their lunches and wonder why I didn’t start this a long time ago. 

4. Coffee times two in the Freemont Diner mug because I need a taste of California today. So much gray.  

5. I do my morning pages for the first time since my return from the desert. Maybe this was my problem—I haven’t been making the time to write myself back to center.  

6. More edits. 

7. It’s an early dismissal day. I talk him into taking me to lunch. Sushi. I out eat him today. A Sauvignon Blanc/Semillon blend from Margaret River Australia instead of sake today.  

8. The article in Chicago Woman Magazine. It’s arrives at the perfect time. Right when I know I need the validation and the encouragement to stay the course. 

9. I try to nap. I’m struggling with my energy levels. This feels like an ongoing battle, me and my body. Is it food? Is it the coffee? Is it depression? Should I just get back to doing yoga?  

10. Two shoots tomorrow in Evanston. Nerves. But ready. I think. So much of this year has been about stretching myself into uncomfortable places. Trying to remember and believe and trust that this is what it feels like to grow.