Ten.One Hundred & Sixty-Three

1. I am awake before the alarm goes off but keep my eyes closed until I just can't anymore. 

2. Warm the leftover crostada, stick the bacon in the oven. 

3. I'm going to get off the coffee for awhile. I think it's time to rest. 

4. Low-budget horror movie and a big glass of warm lemon water = a four-hour nap.

5. I start to fill the tub with hot water and then go back to the kitchen to toast the spices for pho and then I remember that the water is still running and then I run to see the water spilling over the sides and then my spices are burnt. And then there's no pho.

6. I tell him that I quit the day. 

7. I toss the ginger that was supposed to be for the pho into a pot with lemon and cinnamon sticks and water for a big pot of ginger tea.

8. I think about how the Alisha four years ago would have never had that many people in the home without the perfect dining room chairs, without the right art on the walls, without the right lighting in the ceiling. I'm getting better. 

9. Lavendar oil.

10. What am I committed to?

Ten.One Hundred & Sixty-Two

1. I already said we were having waffles. But there is no syrup. It snowed last night and there are still the tiniest snowflakes blowing in the wind.

2. The other two have to come with us to the game. I make them sit on the end of the bench. 

3. We win, but not in the way I want us to. They're all missing the fundamentals. At 10, you need to know the fundamentals. We'll work on that after Christmas. Today, we enjoy the very narrow victory. 

4. The upside of having people over is that you have to clean. A lot. And so at least I know that tomorrow I'll be able to sit by the fireplace and enjoy my clean home. 

5. Chicken tortilla soup, salsa, guacamole, chips, cornbread muffins, apple crostada. 

6. I tell them that my inspiration for this dinner is from my best friend and since my husband said I couldn't invite the whole neighborhood, that I wanted to start with them because of how well they've treated us and my children since we've lived here. That this coming together is my way to say "thank you."

7. Margaritas and wine and fireplace and loud talking.

8. My little introverted self can totally do this again.

9. Someone brings up the California thing. Are we moving? I don't know. Do we want to? Yes. Is it gonna happen? We hope so. Is it gonna happen soon? We have no idea. We just know we're grateful to be where we are.

10. I just want all of them to sleep in tomorrow.

Ten.One Hundred & Sixty-One

1. Bacon and eggs and biscuits.

2. I just wish that I knew how to help him. 

3. I can feel my body tensing up as I head toward the grocery store. The car is still not warm yet. I remember that winter makes me angry. So today I need to shift that mindset. Count my blessings. Imagine I'm in California or New Orleans or anywhere that's warmer than here right now. Stare into the sun. 

4. I have to go to three different stores to find quality salmon.

5. I catch myself scanning the faces in the dining room because I secretly hope to see someone I know. Like, I feel like I need a hug from someone I know. 

6. I think back to the dream. How it left me feeling thrilled and satisfied but also filled with longing and sadness. 

7. The downside of wearing your slippers to pick up the kids from school is that if you forget that you need to go to the store, you have to drive all the way home to put on appropriate footwear.

8. Salmon and risotto and spinach. It's supposed to snow tonight. 

9. He's right. These cookies really are no good.

10. Craving: time to journal and vision in a quiet home, alone. 

Ten.One Hundred & Sixty

1. Jordan Marsh’s blueberry muffin recipe really is the best. I’ve now eaten enough of them to know it without a doubt.  

2. I am interrupted 5 minutes into my 10-minute meditation.  

3. I throw the cold coffee out of my mug and into the sink. I am feeling unprepared to deal with a child who doesn’t like school. I want it to get better but it doesn’t. And I don’t know how to help. 

4. Burnt up log.  

5. Robin and I talk. It’s been far too long since we last spoke. But I love how we can just dive right back into co-creation.  

6. I had forgotten just how joy-filled Molly is. That one hour with her was so needed and I didn’t even realize it.  

7. When you saw a big dream out loud for the first time.  

8. Laundry.

9. “1957” by Milo Green. “As” by Stevie Wonder.  “The Water” by Feist.

10. Rosé. 

 

alisha sommer 4 Comments
Ten.One Hundred & Fifty-Nine

1. The winds are quiet this morning but I can still feel the chill. 

2. Cinnamon Toast for breakfast. Softened butter mixed with sugar and cinnamon slathered onto slices of bread and toasted in the oven. A treat we haven't had in a while.

3. What's the better question?

4. What am I committed to?

5. I love seeing her through my screen. I can't wait to hug her in real life. This is the beauty of co-creation and collaboration and the magic of the internet.

6. Lush and moody.

7. He gets in the car and asks if we can go back to New Orleans? Better yet, "When are we moving to California. I just want to be warm."

8. It's just land and sky. I forget how much earth remains untouched. I wish it would stay that way.

9. I eat a little too much but still make room for dessert. Because: little luxuries.

10. There is very little light on the back roads we take home. The night sky is clear and so black and deep. All I see is the moon and the stars. Amazing how much light the darkness holds.